


This Is Not A Routine Light Switch Check

by nerdwegian



Series: Tumblr Prompts [18]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bodyswap, Hawkguy, M/M, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-21
Updated: 2014-05-21
Packaged: 2018-01-26 00:25:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1667972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdwegian/pseuds/nerdwegian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first thing he registers when the noise stops is that the air around him has somehow--changed. The second thing he registers is a heavily accented voice saying, "Bro, bro, you listening, bro?"</p><p>(Tumblr prompt: Bodyswap.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Is Not A Routine Light Switch Check

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Laura for the beta.
> 
> And uh, sorry about the title. >.>

"So I have a question," Melinda says from behind Phil.

"Hm?" he asks, without looking up from where he's carefully disabling a laser gun.

"Without The Fridge," Melinda says, the corrects herself, "without SHIELD, what are we planning on doing with all this stuff?"

Phil grits his teeth. "I don't know," he says, hating to admit it, but unwilling to lie about it. "Maybe see if we can find a way to destroy as much as possible. The important thing is, we stopped these things from ending up on the black market."

"What's this?" Melinda asks, and Phil turns to see. She steps over an unconscious Hydra agent in order to hand Phil a tiny, complicated-looking device. "I don't recall this on any lists?"

"I don't know," Phil says, frowning. "There was a lot of unregistered tech in The Fridge, though. Hell, for all we know, this didn't even come from The Fridge. We should be careful with it, just in case it's unstabl--"

The light is blinding and immediate, and accompanied by a loud hiss, and Phil squeezes his eyes shut on instinct as the world _tilts_ around him.

The first thing he registers when the noise stops is that the air around him has somehow--changed. The second thing he registers is a heavily accented voice saying, "Bro, bro, you listening, bro?"

Opening first one eye and then the other, Phil finds himself standing on a street corner--New York, is his first thought--with two guys in ugly tracksuits pointing guns at him. A wave of dizziness overtakes him, and his center of gravity feels off, and one of the guys says, "Bro, you _listening_?"

"What?" Phil says, confused--but it's not his voice that comes out of his mouth.

That's about the time Phil realizes something is very, very wrong. There's something strapped to his back, and he's wearing different clothes, and his vision is different. Clearer somehow.

"I said," tracksuit guys says, slowly this time, "put down bow and arrow, bro!"

Phil breathes slowly and quickly goes over what he knows in his head: He's somehow in Clint's body. He doesn't know where Clint is, but he can only hope Clint's in _his_ body. Likely that the device Melinda handed him is the culprit. Two guys pointing guns at him. Clint's bow and quiver strapped to his back, but Phil's not fast enough to do anything about it. He may have Clint's strength now, and the ability to draw the bow at least--but he's not Clint.

Just as he's considering how to best take down these guys, a streak of fur comes flying from the left, growling all the way. The two tracksuit guys both freak out when a dog--a retriever mutt of some sort?--attaches itself to the arm of the guy who'd been addressing Phil.

Taking advantage of the confusion, Phil lunges forward, knocks the gun out of the hand of the other tracksuit guy and follows with a quick punch to his nose. There's a sickening sound and a spray of blood, and Phil immediately becomes acutely aware of exactly how strong Clint's body is. The guy he punched goes down like a sack of potatoes, and it takes very little effort to subdue the other guy, who's still wrestling with the dog.

"Okay, bro, okay, okay!" the guy croaks out, barely able to form words past the chokehold Phil's got him in. "You win, we leave, bro!"

"See that you do," Phil says. The dog has backed off and is watching Phil carefully as he loosens his hold on tracksuit guy. The man falls to the ground, gasping for air, but Phil ignores him. Instead, he gathers up the two guns and then walks off, moving purposefully even if he hasn't quite decided _where_ he's going yet.

The dog follows him, trotting happily at his left side.

Phil sighs and adds this to his list of things he knows: Clint's apparently got a dog.

*

What Clint does not have, however, is a cell phone. At least not one on his person. Phil's definitely in New York, somewhere in Bed-Stuy, and he knows Clint lives in the area, but he doesn't know exactly where. In the end, Phil manages to find a convenience store with a pay phone in the back that looks like it's seen better days, and he manages to fish out a few quarters from the depths of Clint's pockets.

Melinda picks up on the first ring. "Boss?"

"So, this is an interesting situation," Phil says in Clint's raspy voice, and Melinda sighs in obvious relief.

"It's him," she says to someone else, "he's in your body, from the sounds of it."

There's a rustling down the line, and then Phil hears his own voice. It's freaky as fuck, and freakier still because Clint doesn't speak at all like Phil does. His tone, the cadence of his voice, it's all uniquely Clint.

"So," Clint says. "Hell of a way to find out you're not dead."

He sounds pissed.

"Clint--"

"No, seriously," Clint continues, "were you ever gonna tell me? It's been years. _Years_!"

"It was classified," Phil starts, but Clint won't hear it.

"Classified, schmasified, in case you haven't noticed, there is no more SHIELD! You could have contacted me the second shit went belly-up!"

"Why?" Phil asks, frustrated. "What good would that possibly have done?"

"Don't give me that bullshit," Clint says, sounding disgusted. "I deserve to know that my--my--that--when you--I deserved to know."

Phil doesn't know what to say to that. He's not really Clint's anything. After Audrey left, they both acknowledged that they were probably drifting towards something before--before everything. But they never actually got anywhere, and then Loki arrived, and then...

And then.

"Can we--have this discussion later?" Phil asks, swallowing to hide the emotion that's threatening to spill over.

There's a pause on the other end of the phone, and then Clint sighs deeply. "Sure. Melinda says we'll be by to pick you up in like four hours, and then we can see about trying to swap us back, okay?"

Phil nods, which is dumb because Clint can't see him, but it's reflex. "Sure," he says. "Sure."

There's another pause, and then Clint speaks again, hesitant tone sounding odd with Phil's voice. "For what it's worth... I'm uh, I'm really glad you're not dead. Phil."

Hope blossoms in Phil's chest and he smiles into the phone. "Me too."

End.


End file.
